ViperGeek's posterous

ViperGeek's posterous

Dave Dugal  //  A gap between the gas pedal and the floor is just wasted space!

Apr 26 / 7:32am

Joke: Today's Philosophy: Universal Laws


 
 

 

UNIVERSAL LAWS
>
>
1. Law of Mechanical Repair
After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2.
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped,
will roll to the least accessible corner.

>3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act

>4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never
get a busy signal and someone always answers.

>5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for
work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire..

>6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every
time).

>7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water,
the telephone rings.

>8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you
know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen
with.

>9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that
a machine won't work, it will.

>. 12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot
coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee
is cold.

>14.. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich
landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of
the carpet or rug.

>18. Wilson's Law of Commercial
Marketing Strategy
- As soon as you find a product that you
really like, they will stop making it.


>19.
Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment
to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make
an appointment, and you'll stay sick.


 


 


 

 

0 comments

Leave a comment...